Disappointment Avoidance
Posted by C. Holland on Aug 03, 2009After the planning meeting for our new evening outreach service, the elder ended with, “Just don’t be disappointed if people don’t show for the service. This country just doesn’t respond to these things.”
“Don’t be disappointed”? I knew he meant well, and perhaps he was trying to prevent a bad situation from sending me back to the States like so many others before me. My only response was a smile, but immediately I started thinking about his concern. Had he forgotten that I had church planted multiple times in the States, and not all of them continue today? Perhaps because I’m considerably younger than him, it’s easy to miss that I’ve been heavily active in ministry for over half my life. And I’m fully aware of the difficulties of my mission field, from the incredibly hard soil to the nuances of the cultural differences. I realised that it all depends on your definition of “success”.
A commenter on another blog had recently said (paraphrased): “We thought God had great plans for us in the mission field, with hundreds of converts every night, but it didn’t happen. I guess God doesn’t want us to be successful.” I attempted a reply, but, honestly, I think the following from Oswald Chambers says it better:
“We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself.”
Obedience is not a formula, nor is it a means to an end, usually assumed to be success. Perhaps it’s a more Western ideal, even an American lesson, to put numbers and goals to ministry and heap attention only on those who accomplish this—all others need not apply.
If I start defining success in ministry, then I start defining how God should and/or will work in a situation. I am taking away from His mystery, His sovereignty, and His will; in fact, I am wresting power away from Him when I draw that box or map of how this should play out.
Am I disappointed about how some things in life have happened? You bet. I’ve already been disappointed about the untimely death of my sister, my family’s attitude and eventual rejection due to my beliefs, losing out on jobs and friends because of my faith, and the misunderstanding by fellow Christians about what it means to be in modern missions today. Seriously, if the Christian life was solely about not being disappointed, I believe I would have walked away from all of this a very, very long time ago.
Will there be a huge crowd when we begin our outreaches in the fall? Perhaps. I don’t really know. But I do know that while it’s unhealthy to get my hopes up to an astounding level, I also shouldn’t set my expectations incredibly low, either. God is a God of miracles, amazement, wonder. I just need to keep following His leading and leave the rest to Him. My motivation is not about the avoidance of disappointment but being obedient to God’s leading no matter the outcome.
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!Related posts:
- Service v. Devotion to Jesus
The Missionary’s Dilemma, or Let the Dead Bury the Dead
The “Just Be Yourself” Paradox
Missionary Confidential by Email
August 3rd, 2009 at 11:10 pm
Sometimes I think this blog is writing about my former ministry location because some of the things here remind me so much of some of the things that my wife and I dealt with. From a numbers perspective our first work was a disappointment. However, numbers aren’t everything and quite possibly we were sent there to save the handful of people that came to faith in Jesus. Who knows? You’re right however C., avoiding disappointment isn’t the goal. It’s loving obedience to the Father who loves us and sent us to a particular work for a purpose. I hope the fall outreach events are a smashing success and many come to faith in Jesus, or you simply grow a deeper love for Jesus through them. Whichever happens will have been worth it.
August 4th, 2009 at 4:24 am
“Seriously, if the Christian life was solely about not being disappointed, I believe I would have walked away from all of this a very, very long time ago.”
You totally captured my feelings in this sentence. This term has been hard for us and on us. We’ve followed God and paid dearly for it…mostly from other believers….mostly on our own team. This is biblical reality and goes against everything we’re taught in our consumerism, me-centered US church. I’m grateful he’s breaking us out of this mentality…but it sure does hurt.
In our three years here I’ve been able to share the entire gospel a few times, but I’ve seen a dear friend come to faith. He in turn has led others….this is my success. It’ll never make headlines, I’ll never be asked to write a book about it…but it’s success and definitely worth it all.
August 14th, 2009 at 10:19 am
@Kevin: Thanks for the encouragement. It’s much appreciated more than you may know.
@Grady: “paid dearly for it…mostly from other believers” I hear you on that one. It’s one of the reasons I write the blog. Being a missionary is a hard road that so many enter without understanding what you’ve just said. It’s not about being negative or a discourager, I just want to see people enter the field fully aware and (hopefully) better equipped to stick around and make a positive difference for God. And yes, it does hurt.
“never make headlines, I’ll never be asked to write a book about it” Making headlines and writing books are also what we’re taught about ministry in the US church, and I agree that one person coming to the faith is a success.
September 10th, 2009 at 3:29 pm
[...] Holland wrote Aug. 3 about “Disappointment Avoidance.” I’ve been working pretty hard on some other projects and haven’t gotten this far down in my [...]
March 4th, 2010 at 10:34 am
[...] Holland wrote Aug. 3 about “Disappointment Avoidance.” I’ve been working pretty hard on some other projects and haven’t gotten this far down in my [...]