“I Can’t Call You a Missionary”—ouch
Posted by C. Holland on Apr 25, 2009One of our supporters showed up last week. We barely knew her, but she was planning a vacation to our mission field and thought it would be great to stop by and visit. Having gone through this before, we knew the drill what we would be asked and which areas would be key to show our supporter.
Because of the distance from where she was staying, an overnight stay with us made the most sense and we were happy to accommodate. We met up with her and began the tour. First we showed her the church that we work with, which is a Gothic-style, small building in need of repair. Despite the improvements and maintenance needed, it is a beautiful building, complete with stained-glass windows of angels and mortals looking up to heaven. Being American like us, our supporter was astounded by the church, partly because there aren’t too many like this in our home state.
After showing the surrounding areas and explaining the spiritual need of the country, we continued on to our house. As she walked through our place, it was then that she made the statement, with a smile, “I can’t call you a missionary!”
We live in a small but nice house. We have all the accommodations that we had back in the States (refrigerator, oven, TV, bathroom, etc.), and our view happens to be of the countryside. It’s great, and we love it. But it was challenging our supporter’s view of how missionaries live. She didn’t say it maliciously, and she didn’t leave in a huff. She didn’t even say why this particular situation disqualified us from being missionaries, but I know what it was. It was too nice. Not rich, not ostentatious, not even abnormal for the nationals’ standard of living. Just not impoverished squalour.
The unspoken definition of mission work seems to not include us as missionaries because: a) we do not minister in an open-air situation or in a non-church-like structure, b) we do not live in a tent, hut or a third-world situation, and c) evidently having a nice view to look at is a problem. I’m still trying to find where in the Bible it gives specific lifestyle instructions for missionaries. Perhaps I’m missing something?
Even a friend of ours who grew up as a missionary kid in the Philippines told us that his family encountered a similar experience when a supporter discovered that they had a microwave there.
Meanwhile, the reality of our situation is that our location is provided by our church. We are also tentmakers, so our fundraising only covers a portion of our living expenses; we technically make up the lion’s share. Our entertainment outlay is non-existent as we don’t go out to movies, concerts or theatre; and restaurant dinners are reserved for special occasions, like birthdays. We have not given Christmas or birthday gifts to each other for years. Replacement clothing is purchased during sales. We refuse to go to ministry fundraisers here as they require black-tie expenses. Vacations, few and far between, have mostly been due to the generosity of others offering accommodation.
Don’t get me wrong. I love living here, and we do have a nice place to stay. God is blessing both us and our ministry, and we are eternally undeserving. But it’s not exactly like we’re partying or throwing supporters’ money at our entertainment.
I didn’t try to explain all of this because she couldn’t see past her perceptions. We’ll probably lose her support, even though she admitted that we were doing genuine ministry here and hadn’t been deceptive. Maybe there needs to be a re-education about being a missionary today.
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!Related posts:
- How I Became a Missionary, Part 3: Learning the Ropes
How I Became a Missionary, Part 4: You’re Nuts
Thank You For Communicating
Missionary Confidential by Email
I jest. Good one!
April 27th, 2009 at 3:15 pm
[...] “I Can’t Call You a Missionary”—ouch April 27, 2009 By Missionary Confidential [...]
April 28th, 2009 at 12:23 am
How frustrating.
God bless.
April 30th, 2009 at 2:58 am
Thanks for this post. I have had similar experience and believe you are correct in suggesting that there may need to be a reconsideration/eduction on what a missionary is today. I think different cultures and different generations require different approaches. I once remember hearing somewhere that as missionaries we should not live “above” our surrounding neighbours – for example, if you lived in an area where majority of people lived in huts in villages, you should consider not living in a 4 bed house with all amenities… If living and ministering in W.europe then why not live with the amenities that other neighbouring western europeans have an expect?! I guess it brings us back to how you define a missionary? What qualifies as missions and what does not? And does what type of house you live in matter? I think many forget the extra pressures and commitments of missionaries such as being 24/7 on the job at times. It may be necessary for their general well-being to have a nice place to come back to that is refreshing so you can actually do the work God has called you to?
April 30th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
Hi Sonelta, I definitely agree with you! Funny thing is, our surrounding neighbours actually live at even a higher standard than we do, from larger homes and property to brand-new cars. I love exactly what we have and wouldn’t feel comfortable with more, but during her whirlwind visit our supporter wouldn’t recognise the difference as the American socio-economic indicators are different than here.
And I agree that a modest level of comfort isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s okay for a Christian businessman to have a nice view, but not those in the ministry? Many churches in the States wouldn’t have a problem with their pastor living the equivalent of how we live.
May 1st, 2009 at 10:23 pm
It is always interesting to me to have such a differentiation between missions and “lay” persons. We are all called to be a witness, to do what God has called to do, to bring God glory. It can be harder to remain true to God’s word on a day to day basis in the business world, but God needs men and women willing to make stands for Him there just as well as in deep remote villages!
May 2nd, 2009 at 4:04 pm
Hi Alexa, we’re definitely on the same page. I remember telling a fellow Christian (a few years ago in the States) that I viewed my workplace as a “mission field.” My thought was that, even though I was American like the rest of my co-workers, there were 14 people that I had direct contact with for 8 hours a day that did not know Christ–and desperately needed Him.
My friend thought I was nuts, but honestly, my co-workers’ lifestyles and troubles were as foreign to me then as my current surroundings as a missionary in another country and culture. And as the only Christian in the group, I had the same “great commission” calling that anyone else has, whether they be pastor or missionary or lay Christian.
Sometimes I think people like to differentiate between missionaries and lay people because it makes them feel like they’re “off the hook”, not responsible to bring the Gospel in a loving way to others. We’re all part of the Body, and our purpose is to enlarge God’s Kingdom, no matter what our differences are. It’s just like our physical body parts ultimately function to allow us to live, despite being so different to each other.
May 15th, 2009 at 4:01 pm
C.Holland,
I just came across you blog from iMonk and the title was just tremendously intriguing. I am from Western Europe (Belgium) originally, though living in Dallas now.
I am an ex-Roman Catholic, who has a new found faith in the Lord, although I am now a member in a non-denominational Bible Church.
From someone who has lived there for more than 30 years, still has all his family there and who is fortunate enough to go back quite regularly, I think I have some understanding and perhaps even authority in the matter. In addition I have done work in Africa, Asia and Eastern Europe, so I think I can somewhat make a comparison between the different continents.
Western Europe is probably the most difficult missions field there is today.
God Bless you and your ministry.
I think I have someone to add to my prayer list
PS: I’d be interested to know where you are, so feel free to send me an off-line e-mail. I’m coming over in late July / August. Depending where you’re at, I’d be willing to bring you some smaller items if you need any.
In Him
Mick
May 16th, 2009 at 11:19 pm
Wow Mick – I’d like to hear more of your perspective!
August 3rd, 2010 at 11:01 am
Wow, how awkward. Good for you that you invite supporters to observe your environment and work. Good for you that you didn’t feel need to defend or explain your living situation to that person at the time.
August 3rd, 2010 at 2:39 pm
@S: It was tough, because my first reaction was to want to defend. In reality, an explanation of modern missions would require quite a bit of time, making it tough when we weren’t very familiar with our supporter.
August 21st, 2010 at 5:51 pm
I know exactly how you feel… thank you for sharing and may He continue to remain the source of strength for you
(very glad I found your site!)
Mike´s last blog ..From the rising of the sun
August 23rd, 2010 at 8:37 am
@Mike: Welcome to the blog, and thank you. God bless your work.
September 1st, 2010 at 11:23 am
If you came from a “prosperity” church you would have had no problems on any of it. ha ha. Not but seriously, I understand this completely. I feel the pressure to not share too much information on how I live because people sometimes seem more comfortable with their fantasy of what they think my lifestyle is like than the reality of it. The reality is that most missionaries don’t have it that bad. Some paddle up and down the Amazon every day, but they are few and far between from what I’ve seen. What’s good for our Pastors in our supporting churches back home, should at the least be good and acceptable for us on the field. Also, I think some people when they see where we live think to themselves, “Man, then I should be a missionary”! Our response is, “Then come on”!…No takers yet.
September 2nd, 2010 at 11:39 am
@John: Yeah, I have some prosperity friends that would never get a reaction like I did. And I wish we had more takers over here in Western Europe, too.